Home Sweet AnnaBelle











{February 28, 2011}   $hit My Family Says:

“Hm. You look kinda thin. And not in a good way.”

“Can you call these bill collectors and tell them I’m in a women’s shelter?”

“Mom and Dad weren’t alcoholics. They were just bar flies who drank at home when they got older.”

“You and your Dad will always have music. He loved the others, too, even though they were tone deaf.”

“You look like your great grandmother. My God, she was a bitch.”

“You sing like your grandmother. My God, she was a bitch.”

“Well I don’t know what happened…? You all have the same dad, fer Chrissakes, you just got the only tall gene!”

“You know what would look really nice on you? Make up.” [Said by my sweet, well-intentioned sister, who really didn’t understand why I looked incredulous at her “suggestion”. It’s like someone “casually” suggesting gum, deodorant or soap.]

“I totally forgot you had freckles. Mom wouldn’t let us mention them anymore after ****** said they were ugly and you cried. Loser.” [For the record, I was 7.]

“Can I borrow some money? My heat was cut off.”

“Can I borrow some money? My phone was cut off.”

“Can I borrow some money? My mortgage is behind.”

“Can I borrow some money? I can’t pay for my son’s braces/school clothes/school supplies/haircut/tuition?”

“Can I borrow some money? I just got outta jail.”

“Well, I don’t know why they always asked you for money either, fer Chrissakes. It’s not like you have any. You’re just the most gullible, I guess.” [Thanks, Mom.]

“Glad to hear your wisdom teeth came out fine. Hey, did they give you any percocet?”

“I can’t drink coffee without Bailey’s….What?….No….Bailey’s isn’t REALLY alcohol. More like a sweetener that warms me up.”

“I just hope when I kick off, you kids won’t totally disown your sister.” [No promises, Ma.]

“It’s OK. Tall girls can carry off big feet.”

“Yeah, you should probably stuff your bra to wear that shirt.”

“It’s OK. Your Dad’s expectations weren’t unreasonable. After ******, he just prayed the rest of you would hold a job and not steal.” [Hey! For once, I’m ahead of the game! I feel your pride shinin’ down on me, Daddy-O!]

“Whatever, at least I don’t keep garbage on my counter.” [My sister, referring to my kitchen composter.]

“If you don’t have a microwave, how do you cook vegetables?”

“I AM eating healthy. Peanut M&M’s have protein.”

Coming Soon: My Mother’s Mother-isms. Stay tuned, Kids.



{November 30, 2010}   She’s BACK!

I haven’t said anything on my blog about this, and still won’t say much…

But a friend of mine who was away for a little while is back, and I’m so happy. Hopefully her time away was recuperative and constructive, and she can continue to inspire, as she always has.

I’m ecstatic for her return, as are many others.

So happy to have you back, Girl. You were missed. ❤



{October 9, 2010}   The Calm After the Storm

I’m feeling much more peaceful now, after the last post. Yikes. I’m sorry you had to read that, but either I posted it here, or I sent it to my sister, and I thought that this was probably the lesser of two evils. I swear, my head was going to pop right off my neck if I didn’t get it out. I’ll explain more another day. I’m not in the mood to be angry.

So, onto much happier topics…

Isn’t it pretty?

This is a piece of relatively “unspoiled” land, just outside the  town hamlet where we want to live. It is roughly 107 acres, and is listed at $449K.

No, we did not suddenly come into money. We don’t want all 107 acres. But, whomever purchases that land will likely subdivide it, and sell it off, 5 acres at a time, for rural homes. THAT is what we are looking for.

So, if this is the land that we are waiting on, so be it. If it takes 2 years, so be it. I can be patient. No, I can’t. That’s a lie. But, I must. I keep telling myself that if we work hard, save hard, and don’t settle, that things will work out.

I just REALLY want to be out there before the kids start school. I’ve driven by this land. It’s beautiful. Treed, and backs onto a wildlife reserve, which is amazing. We would keep most of it just like this–raw, except for the front 1-2 acres where the house/yard/garden/fruit trees/chicken coop would be.

I just keep thinking of my kids. I have NEVER loved another human being like I love them. I love them so much, that it physically hurts at times, and I mean that. I have never been so grateful for anything in my life. And I want them to have this. I want them to be able to play outside amidst trees and flowers. I want them to be able to eat fresh eggs (hopefully my son outgrows his allergy), and I want them to occasionally wake up to a deer in the yard. I want them to know where their food comes from, and know their neighbours. I grew up in a smaller community, and there are aspects of that community that simply cannot be replicated in the city. I guess it’s natural to want to give your kids the best of what you had, and spare them the worst.

I’ll keep you posted on how the land shapes up. It’s been on the market since February, and no takers yet. We’ll see.



{September 30, 2010}   3 Awesome Things

1) My kids are so cool. Today, I was ahead of the game on almost everything (LOVE when that happens!) and got to play with my kids ALL DAY. Well, anytime they were awake, that is. I guess another awesome thing is that they both napped at the same time today, which lately has been a total no-go.

2) My son’s beautiful curls are long again, and he needs a hair cut. But he’s so cute when he wakes up with bedhead that it kills me to cut it.

3) On the topic of hair, my previously bald baby is now a beautiful 12 month old girl who is rockin’ the toddler mullet. So awesome.



{August 26, 2010}   Today I will…

Not take myself too seriously.

Have as much fun as possible.

Understand that others grieve differently than I do.

Write a blog post (check, check).

Be grateful for what I have instead of wishing for what I don’t.

Call and talk to a real person. On the phone. Sans typing.

Love people unconditionally. Not even in spite of their foibles and fallability, but because of them.

Wash the kitchen floor. Maybe.



{August 22, 2010}   Kids are HILARIOUS

In an effort to clean up my trucker mouth in the presence of my newly verbal 2 year old, I have reverted to the vernacular that was such a part of me once upon a time…When I worked with kids on a daily basis.

Some of my favorite expressions of surprise/joy are: “Holy Hannah!”, “Oh my stars!” and “Oh my word!” (all of which are ultimately used in situations when I would ordinarily say “Holy fuck”, “Holy Shit”, or “Jesus Christ”. The last one doesn’t offend me so much, but it does my husband, so there you go.

I also have silly words/phrases that are meant to substitute, but still sound like the real thing. “Oh, for FOX CREEK!” is a favorite of mine, as is “SUGAR!”.

Then, there are the silly words that are NOT substitutions for profanity, but are entertaining nonetheless. My son will be the only one in the first grade who will be wearing “pantaloons” and eating “roast beast”. Oy.

So, it looks like I did it all in the nick of time. Because today, as I was trying to get my son dressed and I dropped his shirt on the floor, he put his little hands on his rosy little cheeks, and exclaimed, “OH, STARS!”

3 weeks ago, I’d have been telling you about my son’s first F-bomb, I guarantee it.



{August 20, 2010}   Today, I am grateful for…

My kids.

My husband.

The time I had with my Dad.

My wonderful friends, who are being so understanding as I recede into relative solitude for a while.

My kids.

My kids.

Online scrabble.



{May 29, 2010}   28 Going On 30

So, in spite of Thursday being my birthday, things were pretty chill. Funnily enough, I forgot my age until I was reminded. I thought for weeks that I was turning 30. What the hell?! Thank goodness my husband was around to call me a moron and tell me to do the math, or I’d have just skipped right over a whole year of my life!

Last night, I had the pleasure of meeting an old friend for tea. What a fantastic birthday gift! I have honestly known this girl since I was about 7 years old, and we lost touch years ago. She has been living in the UK for the last several years working as a teacher, though it sounds like she’ll be returning to this side of the pond in the next 9 months or so. I’m ecstatic.

Some of my best memories from childhood took place at her house. Everything there was always so normal, so stable and so comforting. She lived on a large acreage outside of town, we had so much fun. She, her sister, and myself would spend HOURS just…being kids. It was wonderful. They had an above ground pool, musical instruments, and so much land to explore! It was amazing. It’s the kind of childhood I want to give to my kids. I often think of their home when I ask myself what I want my own children to remember.

They were never wealthy. In fact, they went through a lot of hardship due to circumstances (WAY) beyond their control…But they managed to keep their house. The house that I remembered as being so enormous was actually not the least bit enormous. Not small, just average. I guess I just remember it being full of people and happy times.

Walking through that house was one of the first times I’ve ever been able to recall a period of my childhood with such fondness and nostalgia.

What a WONDERFUL feeling. And a beautiful birthday gift indeed, to know my childhood wasn’t totally lost.



et cetera